Fantasy Trip: Serengeti-Migration of Wildebeests

picture borrowed from Serengeti.org

I'm standing on the plains of the Serengeti, waatching the migration of the Wildebeests. This is an amazing spectacle that I am yearning to see. I think this is the ultimate pilgrimage...for over 1.4 million Wildebeests. Can you imagine that many animals running by you? Can you imagine the noise? Can you imagine the smell?

Check out Nileguide's travel destinations...Africa is one of them!

Update--She's almost 2 years old!

Well here we are almost 2 years later--to her 2nd birthday. She's grown so much. And so have I! I've been enjoying my life as her mother. I've been so incredibly busy that I haven't had much time for anything these past 2 years except loving and learning about Jadyn. I adore her. I couldn't ask for more. Except to learn how to manage my time better!

Another moment of missing..........

I just finished watching the movie "The Secret Life of Bees" and found myself crying through most of it. The movie wasn't what was making me sad, it was what the movie was stirring in me. For those of you who aren't familiar with the story...its about a young girl growing up poor in the 60's who runs away from home to the place she thought she could learn about her deceased mother. She ends up living with 4 black women who become mothers to her. The movie was about mothers, mother-less children, child-less mothers and strong women teaching a young girl how to love herself and how to be strong.

What was making me sad was feeling like a mother-less child, and worrying about how my daughter was going to feel about herself having been "given away" by her birth mother. The longing I was feeling for my mother was overwhelming at times. And the worry I was feeling for my daughter was also overwhelming.

It's been 3 1/2 years since my mother passed away and I've been missing her a lot lately. The feelings are pretty raw and the longing for her, intense.

The anniversary of my father's death is in 4 days and I feel his loss intensely as well. It surprised me how much I was missing both my parents these past few days. I can't put my finger on why this year. I haven't missed my dad as much as I've missed him the past few days in many years.

Maybe, what's stirring the feelings is that I'm a mother myself and I worry about dying and leaving my daughter, who's already been left by one mother. I hope her knowledge of that first leaving is offset by how much I love her. I hope she always feels my presence and my love.

Zoo Boo Days in 2009.

Penguin on the loose!

My sweet pea!

Big Girl!

I have no idea what she's saying, but she's been scolding me a lot lately!




She's walkin! She's talkin! Where has the time gone???

Swinging on the Swing!

You should see my baby’s face when she’s sitting on the swing and I’m pushing her. She’s smiling and laughing and then she finally gets in the zone. While she’s swinging she’s singing. Hey, that rhymes. But really, she’s so cute. She loves swinging on the swing. When I stopped the swing to take her off so she could play on the slide she started screaming. I got it, loud and clear. She wanted to keep swinging. So that’s what we did. We swung on the swing.

More cake!

 

Happy 1st Birthday Cake, a little early!

 

June Pictures

Fresh from the dryer!!

Sleeping Beauty!

Sweet Baby!

Bubbi Judy and Zaidi Bob

Last Monday my sister and I took our children, along with our step dad, to the cemetery. It was the 3rd anniversary of our mom's death. The visit to the cemetery wasn't a quiet nor serene one as I had been thinking it should have been. But Rachel reminded me that we have kids now and kids make noise and fuss and move around and want to move and be out of the stroller and etc.. So, the visit went exactly as it was supposed to go. With kids making noise and moving all around and Zack running around. Just as they would be doing if we were visiting my parents at their home. So...

Dear mom and dad,
I hope its true what everyone says...that you know about the kids and see them and feel so proud and full of joy when you watch them playing and being loved by us, your children. I Hope you know that even though we didn't always get along or agree, I fully believe you loved me and us. That because of that love, all four of us are able to love our children. Yes, all four of us have children now. I have a daughter and Rick has a son. I believe we are all good parents because we had you for parents. Parenting isn't an easy job; with the "ghosts in the nursery" haunting every parent and the day to day issues, its amazing that anyone turns out okay. But, we did. You did the best you could and we turned out okay. Not perfect. But okay. I am proud to say I am your daughter.

Mom, I named my daughter after you and your mother. I hope you are pleased by that. I wanted to honor you both. Even though I don't remember Grandma Rose, she played a very significant role in my life. You remember when I was a child I didn't like my name and always threatened that I was going to change it as soon as I turned 18. Well, you know I could never do that. Grandma Rose named me. I still wish she had named me Sonya Ann, rather then Suanne. But she didn't. I hope Jadyn Rose likes her name. I will tell her all about the strong women whom she is named after. I will make sure she knows how much love has been passed on from generation to generation. I will share with her all my memories of you and the stories I've heard about your mother. I will help her feel strong and proud.

I hope I honor the parents you were by being the best parent I can be. Not perfect, but the best I can be.

Thank you for helping to shape who I am. I love and miss you both.

Jadyn

Here's some more pictures!

More pictures of my baby!

 

9 months old today--April 12

8 months tomorrow!

Miss J. will be 8 months tomorrow. 5 months corrected age. Look at my beauty!!!

Are we there yet?

I have one thing to say...Is it spring yet?

She's 7 months old!

Here is Miss J. celebrating her 7 month birthday! She's looking so big, and look at those eyes!!!



This picture was taken just before everyone arrived for a play date. Miss J is sitting on the couch waiting for her friends. Look at those eyes!



Here's Miss J and a very good friend, also adopted.

25 random things about Me.

1. I love being a mom.
2. I hate exercising.
3. I don't look my age.
4. My best friend is my sister.
5. I don't feel my age.
6. I am a chocoholic.
7. My favorite season is spring.
8. I love acting childlike.
9. I haven't read a novel in a long while.
10. My desk is a total mess.
11. I hate cleaning.
12. I've only been drunk once in my life.
13. I enjoy knitting, playing the piano, taking photographs, making pottery and beaded
jewelry.
14. I have 2 cats.
15. I had 2 cats who lived to the ripe old ages of 24 and 22.
16. I hate that my house in Lansing has more luxuries then my house in the metro Detroit
area does and that I don't live in Lansing any longer.
17. I am a master gardener abv (all but volunteer work.)
18. I have a secret desire to be a published author.
19. I've written a children's story.
20. I've written an article that I would like to have published.
21. I have found a journal that will publish it if I just added a literature review.
22. I am afraid to add the literature review even though a colleague of mine promised he
would help me.
23. I've traveled to Israel, Bahama's, Cancun, Costa Rica, Thailand, Canada and many of
the United States.
24. I used to windsurf...I miss doing it.
25. I love saying "Watch for leezards, lady!"

A few random things about me and Miss J.

1. I love how she nuzzles into my chest when she's tired.
2. I love that she hums when she eats.
3. I love the sounds she makes when she's tired.
4. I love that she often wakes me up by talking and screeching.
5. I love the sound of her laughter.
6. I love the faces she makes when she's eating rice cereal.
7. I love how excited she gets when she sees her bottle.
8. I love how she looks to me and at me when she's in another persons arms.
9. I love the color of her eyes.
10. I love that she grabs my shirtsleeve when I'm changing her diaper.
11. I love that she puts her cheek next to mine.
12. I love the sound of her sweet voice.
13. I love that she's starting to switch her toy from one hand to the other.
14. I love that she insists on sitting up most of the time now.
15. I love that she's beginning to roll over from her tummy to her back.